So normally I like to think of myself as a pretty logical person. Hopefully not like the clueless FBI agent/CIA agent/police officer/museum curator/professor in the movies that is always saying, “But this can’t be! I’m sure of it!” right before the alien/killer pandemic/ghost/prehistoric curse offs them (after all, I have seen all seven seasons of Buffy at least 4 times plus the first graphic novel). But in general, I think I’m fairly level-headed.
But my normally logical thinking completely breaks down with my belief in some weird karmic scorecard where the universe is constantly weighing everything I say or do and altering our lives because of it. And not in systematic ways, like if you try hard and think positively things will work out. No it’s like a guessing game of random events that I’m sure will determine our fate.
Take for instance, the potential of Steve working here on campus. Everything I say about it, think about it, and even completely non-related events affect, in my mind, the chances of this happening. If I mention it too many times, then we want it too badly and the universe will teach us a lesson. If I don’t mention it enough, then we don’t want it badly enough and it will go to someone else who wanted it the proper amount. Since Becca got her job in Flagstaff, maybe that means that the universe will be balanced by Steve not getting his. Maybe me running into another advisor he would work with is a positive sign, or maybe the fact that I didn’t ride my bike to work enough this week will result in punishment.
Flying is another one that gets me. If I don’t worry at all about flying will the universe try to be ironic and make that the time the plane goes down? Or if I worry too much will I project negative mojo on the plane and make it worse than if I were thinking positively? How can I possibly keep the perfect balance of positive and negative thoughts that are obviously the only thing keeping the plane in the air?
After reading this post, my mom will be thinking that I need more to do. It’s probably true.
But whatever your idea of positive thinking, praying, altering karma, could you please try to do it for Steve to get the job here? Maybe your system will work better than mine.
(Too bad this blog post will do no good since my hope that Steve gets his job is semi-selfish and the universe only rewards completely altruistic thought. Foiled me again, universe!)
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2 comments:
I'll keep hoping Steve gets the job so it benefits the both of you. I have nothing to gain from it, so maybe it will work. Additionally, I won't ruin it by going into a karmic deficit by fighting with old ladies in the grocery store. It will be a sacrifice, but I will do it for you guys. =O)
May I suggest that you read (re-read) Leslie Weatherhead's "The Will of God"? :-)
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